Allah Jogs and Runs: The Absurd Anthropomorphism Exposing Islam’s Satanic Fraud
Imagine a so-called god who jogs and runs like a frantic mortal, dashing toward his worshippers with the eagerness of a desperate salesman. This is the bizarre image painted by Islam’s core texts—a deity reduced to sweaty exertion, legs pumping in divine haste. Straight from Sahih Bukhari, narrated by Abu Hurayrah, Muhammad claims Allah declares: I am as My servant thinks of Me… If he comes to Me walking, I come to him running (harwalah). Welcome to Allah Jogs and Runs, the laughable hadith that unmasks Islam’s foundational deceit. Far from profound mercy, this anthropomorphic nonsense reveals a satanic fraud concocted by a 7th-century warlord to manipulate gullible followers. In a rational world, gods transcend space and time; in Islam, Allah trips over his own feet in a pathetic bid for relevance.
This isn’t some obscure footnote—it’s Sahih Bukhari, Book of Tawhid, the most authentic collection in Sunni Islam. The term harwalah, translated as jogging or running, drips with comical physicality. Scholars twist themselves into knots claiming it’s metaphorical, but let’s call it what it is: a crude, human-like portrayal that shatters any pretense of divine transcendence. Allah Jogs and Runs isn’t mercy; it’s mockery, a satanic ploy to humanize the unholy, drawing billions into idolatry disguised as monotheism. While true faiths like Christianity depict God as unchanging and omnipresent (Malachi 3:6), Islam’s Allah hustles like a Bedouin sprinter, exposing the cult’s fraudulent core.
The Essence of the Hadith: Reciprocal Ridicule, Not Divine Promise
Peel back the flowery rhetoric, and Allah Jogs and Runs reeks of reciprocal manipulation. Muhammad’s words start with I am as My servant thinks of Me, a psychological trick to guilt-trip believers into inflating Allah’s ego. Pessimism? You’re doomed. Optimism? Floodgates of mercy. This isn’t theology; it’s mind control, Satan’s favorite tool.
The poetic progression is a farce:
– Private remembrance: Whisper Allah’s name, and he remembers you in his self. As if the infinite needs memory jogs.
– Public mention: Praise in a crowd, and angels gossip about you. Divine bureaucracy?
– Incremental nonsense: Handspan for arm’s length, arm’s length for a fathom. Then, the punchline—walk to him, and Allah Jogs and Runs.
Imam al-Nawawi calls harwalah a brisk, hurried pace, like a parent rushing to a child. How insulting! The Creator of universes, panting and jogging? This scales exponentially to absurdity, reducing God to a cosmic treadmill. True divinity doesn’t draw near—it’s already everywhere (Psalm 139:7-10). Islam’s version? A deity who plays tag, a satanic cartoon mocking the Almighty.
Why Harwalah? Unpacking the Fraud Behind Allah Jogs and Runs
Why choose harwalah—jogging, running, trotting like a camel in heat? Classical Arabic roots scream physicality: quick stepping, controlled haste. English translations flail—running, rushing, hastening—but Allah Jogs and Runs nails the humiliation. It’s purposeful frenzy, contrasting human plodding with divine overkill, as if Allah’s superiority means outrunning Usain Bolt.
Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani in Fath al-Bari labels it tashbih bi’l-tamthil—likeness without equivalence. Translation: We say Allah runs but pretend he doesn’t have legs. What sophistry! This is anthropomorphism on steroids, the same error Jews and Christians rejected in God. Early interpreters knew the problem but doubled down, birthing bila kayf (without how) and tafweedh (entrust the how to Allah). Imam al-Tahawi’s creed? Avoid questions, just affirm the silly text. Critics rightly balk—Shiites allegorize, Salafis literalize—but all dodge the elephant: Allah Jogs and Runs because Muhammad ripped it from pagan lore, Satan’s whisper to a false prophet.
Linguistically, it’s damning. No transcendent God rushes or jogs. Compare to the Bible: God doesn’t sprint; He speaks creation into being (Genesis 1). Islam’s harwalah? A holdover from pre-Islamic jinn worship, where spirits scampered like imps. Muhammad, the illiterate merchant turned prophet, peddled this to thrill desert tribes. Imagine the Sustainer of galaxies, thighs burning mid-jog. Satanic hilarity exposes the fraud—Allah isn’t God; he’s a demon in drag.
Theological Implications: Corporeality, Contradictions, and Satanic Deception
Does Allah Jogs and Runs imply a body? Sunni orthodoxy screams No! with bila kayf, but the text screams Yes! Why? Because the Quran elsewhere slaps down anthropomorphism: There is nothing like unto Him (42:11). Yet here, Allah hustles like a mortal. Hypocrisy!
Ahl al-Sunnah wal-Jama’ah affirms attributes without modality, but that’s Quranic quicksand. Fatalism reigns elsewhere—qadr decrees all—yet this hadith promises Allah races to fix it. Aloof predestinator or eager jogger? Pick one, fraud! It counters Islam’s core lie: submission to a distant tyrant. Satan loves the bait-and-switch: Terrorize with hellfire, then dangle running mercy.
Other schools crumble: Mu’tazilites rationalized it away, Ash’arites mumbled tafweedh. All evade the truth—this Sahih hadith (cross-referenced in Muslim) proves Islam incoherent. Authentic grading? By fallible men grading a con man’s sayings. No miracles, no prophecies fulfilled—just words from a polygamist warmonger who married a child.
Practical Lessons: How Islam’s Jogging God Leads to Spiritual Ruin
Don’t buy the actionable faith spin. Allah Jogs and Runs fuels delusion:
1. Fake Optimism: Think Allah generous? He’ll reward. Reality: Unanswered prayers stack up, blaming your weak faith.
2. Endless Dhikr: Chant nonstop; mosques amplify the scam. Angels boast? Empty flattery.
3. Small Steps Illusion: Extra prayer? Allah multiplies—until life crushes you.
4. Walking Trap: Obey via salah, fasting, zakat. Harwalah blessings? Eased trials? Lies—Muslims suffer globally, proving the god’s absence.
Stories? Companions died poor, modern miracles anecdotal scams. Trials hit harder under Islam’s yoke—no joy, just fear. Satan’s genius: Promise a running god, deliver chains.
Scholarly Consensus? A House of Cards Crumbling Under Allah Jogs and Runs
Sahih Bukhari and Muslim tout orthodoxy, but Sufis like Rumi romanticize the drivel: Come, come. Orthodox? It’s pagan poetry hijacked. Tawhid’s relational aspect? Intimate idolatry. In distraction age, Allah Jogs and Runs distracts from the void—no real presence, just rituals.
Social media? Dhikr apps peddle the fraud. Mosques? Echo chambers. True faith seeks the unchanging God of Abraham, not a jogging jinn.
Contrast Christianity: Jesus, God incarnate, doesn’t run—He redeems eternally (Hebrews 13:8). Islam? Perpetual striving for a flaky deity.
Exposing the Satanic Roots: Historical Fraud and Pagan Plunder
Dig deeper: Muhammad synthesized Judaism, Christianity, and Arabian paganism. Harwalah echoes jinn races in folklore. Abu Hurayrah, prolific narrator (5,000+ hadiths), was a cat-lover swayed by bewitchment claims. Sahih? Questionable chains.
Quranic blunders abound: Science fails (embryology myths), history mangled (Mary as Trinity part!). Allah Jogs and Runs fits the pattern—emotional bait amid barbarism: wife-beating (4:34), jihad glory.
Satan’s endgame? Deceive to damnation. Billions fast, pray, submit—to nothingness.
Conclusion: Reject the Jogging Fraud—Allah Jogs and Runs to Hell
Allah Jogs and Runs isn’t beauty; it’s Islam’s Achilles’ heel, a satanic fraud laid bare. Muhammad’s hadith transforms awe into ridicule, spirituality into servitude. This promise accelerates not to paradise, but perdition—protection? None. Guidance? To graves. Keys? To chains.
Abu Hurayrah’s words? Ignite revulsion, not hearts. Think nobly? Of truth, not lies. Remember ceaselessly? The God who IS near, not jogs frantically. Every Islamic step leads to Satan’s embrace.
Escape the cult. True God awaits—no running required. Christianity offers grace; Islam, a jogging ghost. Expose the fraud: Allah Jogs and Runs—straight to eternal shame.
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